The Award

Would you too like to receive an award, like the one you’d be given at Moorview’s summer barbecue, but not quite the same? Well, now you can! Just download the following image, print it on A4 and write your name!

A remade version of the award presented at the Moorview barbecue. Contains the 'Moorview Do Not Care logo', and the text: "Certificate of No Achievement. This is to certify that:" and a blank space to write a name, then "Has shown no commitment and made zero progress toward their goals. Keep up the excellent facade!." It is signed "The Management".
An award in the style of the Moorview Barbecue Award

Unfortunately, I’m not able to offer the Discount Temu Oscar (that would have been included) as a download, but they are available on Amazon or Temu for about £35 for a box of 40.

After confronting the company on this, they claim that award reasons were kept private for confidentiality reasons, but… they did give an award to every client who attended and did not give any awards for those that did not. To me that suggests they wanted the optics for social media rather than a genuine appreciation of any of our achievements.

Yes, they have given awards at previous ceremonies, but I’m told this is the first they gave an award to everybody who attended. Doesn’t that make it rather more like a wooden spoon award?

I can understand that some may appreciate receiving an award like this, if this subtext isn’t understood, however, I saw through the pretence, and I cannot unsee that.